Not your fucking friend
Jesse POV
"What's got you so pissed of today." Jack one of my closest friends asked.
"Fuck no," I say as I move the phone away from Jack as he had moved closer to me.
"Hey don't get mad at me. I am just teasing you. Besides I have seen her in bikinis countless times."
"Keep those dirty thoughts at bay," I say to Jack.
"You need to tell her how you feel."
"I can't. We have been through this before. I just need to control my thoughts and pick one bikini." I say as I receive another text from Alex.
"You can't always control things you know. You need to tell her how you feel before it blows up in your face."
"I'll think about it. I should get going Alex needs me to pick her up."
"You are so screwed," Jack says as I move to get my jacket and baseball hat.
"I know," I say as I smile to myself and walk away.
I drive to Victoria's secret that Alex is shopping at. I text her that I am outside waiting and instead of her coming out she asks me to come in and help her pick between two more bikinis.
I take a few minutes to myself trying to tame my wild thoughts and emotions.
I walk into the store and find Alex talking to one of the store clerks.
"Jesse. Thank you for coming." She says as she walks over me and embraces me in a hug
"No problem. So what do you need my help with?"
"I am trying to pick between these two suits. But I am just picking some more so that I can have a wide range."
"Alex. You know I hate shopping. I think you have enough clothes for now. Let's try the ones you have in your hand."
"I know you hate it. That's why I will take you out for lunch once we are done shopping."
"Okay. Go try the suits and I will wait out here."
"No. Come with me to the changing room."
"Naah. I am fine waiting for you out here." I say trying to play it cool despite knowing that I would 100% just at the opportunity if we weren't just friends.
"If you are with me in the changing room, I will take less time trying on all of them.
"Ugh fine but you better buy me some scotch also."
"Done. Let's go. This will be so much fun." Alex says and I can feel the excitement in her voice which does nothing to calm my nerves.
"How does this one look?" Alex asks me for what feels like the millionth time.
"It looks great," I answer plainly trying not to lose my shit.
"It doesn't sound like it. Are you okay?"
"I am fine. It looks great. Everything that you put on will always look great on you." I look at my phone once I am done talking just to avoid having to look at her.
"Are you sure? Why won't you look at me?"
"I am fucking sure. Pick whatever you want. I am going to wait in the car." As I leave the dressing room, I immediately regret cursing at her and acting dismissive towards her.
After seating in my car for a few minutes, I receive a text from Alex asking me where I had parked. I quickly send her a reply and I get out of the car and open the trunk to put the bags. It takes just a few minutes for me to see her walking towards me but she doesn't have any bags with her. She walks straight past me and gets to the passage's seat without saying a word. I take a deep breath gathering up the courage to apologize to her.
"I am sorry for cursing and raising my voice at you. I was... am an ass for doing that."
She remains silent just starring outside the window. I can tell she is crying so that only breaks my heart more.
"Alex. I am sorry. Please look at me."
"Take me home." She says quietly still looking outside.
"What about shopping? We can go back and get your clothes." I say as I put my hand on her leg only to have her move retract her leg.
"Take me home please."
"Okay. I truly am sorry Alex."
I as I drive us to her place she doesn't say a word nor does she even look my way. We arrive a few minutes later. I get out before her and open the door for her. She gets out but doesn't take my hand. We walk into her house but she still avoids me so I again apologize.
"Alex. I am sorry about earlier. Please stop avoiding me. Please talk to me." I say as I talk a seat opposite her.
"Why did you curse at me? You know how much I hate that."
"I was just tired. I didn't mean it."
"If you are going to lie to me. You can just leave. We don't need to talk today." She says as she gets up and heads towards her bedroom.
"Wait," I say and she stops turning her attention back to me.
"The truth is that I was mad. I was disappointed with myself."
"Why?" She asked as she took a seat next to me put her hand under my chin lifting my head up so that I could look at her.
"When you asked me to help you shop, I experienced a moment of inappropriate thoughts. I know that we are just friends so I got upset with myself so I had to leave and just regather myself."
"What were your thoughts?" She asked.
"I can't Alex."
"Please tell me. I won't judge you."
"I was thinking about how it would be nice if you were shopping for a bikini suit that you were going to wear for a beach date with me. I was thinking of all the moments I wanted to be more than friends with you. And then I remembered that we can't be more than friends."
"What makes you think that we can't we be more than friends?"
"You have a type that I don't match."
"The only type I date is human which I am sure you are. Are you upset because I said no when you asked me out?"
"Maybe," I answered.
"I only said no because you were going through rehab for your leg. You were not in the right place to have a relationship. I didn't what us to break up just because we were not patient enough to wait."
"Why then didn't you mention anything when I was done with rehab?"
"You started dating different women so I thought it would be best if we just remain as friends."
"Well, I don't want to be your friend anymore. You calling and asking for help with bikinis and dresses doesn't help me control my emotions. I think maybe I should take a break from you and try to learn how we can be friends."
"Ask me." She said.
"Ask you what?"
"Ask me out right now."
"Why would I do that?"
"I am giving one more chance to ask me out on a date so you better take it." She said with a commanding voice.
"Will you go out on a date with me over the weekend?"
"No. I have a business trip then. I will go out with you tomorrow at 6. So you better head out and start planning on it. I want the full Jesse experience." She says as she takes my hand and leads me to the door.
"Are you serious?" I asked in disbelief that she said yes.
"Pick me up tomorrow at 6. You can let yourself in if I take long to answer the door."
"Okay. So I'll see you tomorrow at 6." I said while standing outside her door while she stands at the door holding the handle from inside the house.
"Yes, you will. And by the way, the next time you curse at me, it better be with my hand down your pants." She said. Quickly shutting the door closed leaving me no chance to respond.
"Alex is asking me for advice on some bikini suits. She sent me three different photos."
"Can I see?"
"Can I see?"
"Fuck no," I say as I move the phone away from Jack as he had moved closer to me.
"Hey don't get mad at me. I am just teasing you. Besides I have seen her in bikinis countless times."
"Keep those dirty thoughts at bay," I say to Jack.
"You need to tell her how you feel."
"I can't. We have been through this before. I just need to control my thoughts and pick one bikini." I say as I receive another text from Alex.
"You can't always control things you know. You need to tell her how you feel before it blows up in your face."
"I'll think about it. I should get going Alex needs me to pick her up."
"You are so screwed," Jack says as I move to get my jacket and baseball hat.
"I know," I say as I smile to myself and walk away.
I drive to Victoria's secret that Alex is shopping at. I text her that I am outside waiting and instead of her coming out she asks me to come in and help her pick between two more bikinis.
I take a few minutes to myself trying to tame my wild thoughts and emotions.
I walk into the store and find Alex talking to one of the store clerks.
"Jesse. Thank you for coming." She says as she walks over me and embraces me in a hug
"No problem. So what do you need my help with?"
"I am trying to pick between these two suits. But I am just picking some more so that I can have a wide range."
"Alex. You know I hate shopping. I think you have enough clothes for now. Let's try the ones you have in your hand."
"I know you hate it. That's why I will take you out for lunch once we are done shopping."
"Okay. Go try the suits and I will wait out here."
"No. Come with me to the changing room."
"Naah. I am fine waiting for you out here." I say trying to play it cool despite knowing that I would 100% just at the opportunity if we weren't just friends.
"If you are with me in the changing room, I will take less time trying on all of them.
"Ugh fine but you better buy me some scotch also."
"Done. Let's go. This will be so much fun." Alex says and I can feel the excitement in her voice which does nothing to calm my nerves.
"How does this one look?" Alex asks me for what feels like the millionth time.
"It looks great," I answer plainly trying not to lose my shit.
"It doesn't sound like it. Are you okay?"
"I am fine. It looks great. Everything that you put on will always look great on you." I look at my phone once I am done talking just to avoid having to look at her.
"Are you sure? Why won't you look at me?"
"I am fucking sure. Pick whatever you want. I am going to wait in the car." As I leave the dressing room, I immediately regret cursing at her and acting dismissive towards her.
After seating in my car for a few minutes, I receive a text from Alex asking me where I had parked. I quickly send her a reply and I get out of the car and open the trunk to put the bags. It takes just a few minutes for me to see her walking towards me but she doesn't have any bags with her. She walks straight past me and gets to the passage's seat without saying a word. I take a deep breath gathering up the courage to apologize to her.
"I am sorry for cursing and raising my voice at you. I was... am an ass for doing that."
She remains silent just starring outside the window. I can tell she is crying so that only breaks my heart more.
"Alex. I am sorry. Please look at me."
"Take me home." She says quietly still looking outside.
"What about shopping? We can go back and get your clothes." I say as I put my hand on her leg only to have her move retract her leg.
"Take me home please."
"Okay. I truly am sorry Alex."
I as I drive us to her place she doesn't say a word nor does she even look my way. We arrive a few minutes later. I get out before her and open the door for her. She gets out but doesn't take my hand. We walk into her house but she still avoids me so I again apologize.
"Alex. I am sorry about earlier. Please stop avoiding me. Please talk to me." I say as I talk a seat opposite her.
"Why did you curse at me? You know how much I hate that."
"I was just tired. I didn't mean it."
"If you are going to lie to me. You can just leave. We don't need to talk today." She says as she gets up and heads towards her bedroom.
"Wait," I say and she stops turning her attention back to me.
"The truth is that I was mad. I was disappointed with myself."
"Why?" She asked as she took a seat next to me put her hand under my chin lifting my head up so that I could look at her.
"When you asked me to help you shop, I experienced a moment of inappropriate thoughts. I know that we are just friends so I got upset with myself so I had to leave and just regather myself."
"What were your thoughts?" She asked.
"I can't Alex."
"Please tell me. I won't judge you."
"I was thinking about how it would be nice if you were shopping for a bikini suit that you were going to wear for a beach date with me. I was thinking of all the moments I wanted to be more than friends with you. And then I remembered that we can't be more than friends."
"What makes you think that we can't we be more than friends?"
"You have a type that I don't match."
"The only type I date is human which I am sure you are. Are you upset because I said no when you asked me out?"
"Maybe," I answered.
"I only said no because you were going through rehab for your leg. You were not in the right place to have a relationship. I didn't what us to break up just because we were not patient enough to wait."
"Why then didn't you mention anything when I was done with rehab?"
"You started dating different women so I thought it would be best if we just remain as friends."
"Well, I don't want to be your friend anymore. You calling and asking for help with bikinis and dresses doesn't help me control my emotions. I think maybe I should take a break from you and try to learn how we can be friends."
"Ask me." She said.
"Ask you what?"
"Ask me out right now."
"Why would I do that?"
"I am giving one more chance to ask me out on a date so you better take it." She said with a commanding voice.
"Will you go out on a date with me over the weekend?"
"No. I have a business trip then. I will go out with you tomorrow at 6. So you better head out and start planning on it. I want the full Jesse experience." She says as she takes my hand and leads me to the door.
"Are you serious?" I asked in disbelief that she said yes.
"Pick me up tomorrow at 6. You can let yourself in if I take long to answer the door."
"Okay. So I'll see you tomorrow at 6." I said while standing outside her door while she stands at the door holding the handle from inside the house.
"Yes, you will. And by the way, the next time you curse at me, it better be with my hand down your pants." She said. Quickly shutting the door closed leaving me no chance to respond.
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